Boundary Building!

Activity Glossary

Glossary of Terms

At URSTRONG, we believe it’s important to use kids’ language for kids’ problems. That’s why we have our very own, unique language of friendship. Here are some important terms that children, parents, and teachers learn in our program.

Friendship Fire®: Any situation between you and a friend that results in negative feelings.

Mean-on-Purpose: When someone is intentionally unkind to someone else.

Quick Comeback: A very short word or phrase that is used when someone is Mean-on-Purpose. Quick Comebacks are designed to let the other person know that you heard/saw what they did and you’re not okay with it.

Friend-o-meter: A visual tool that assesses the health of friendships, ranging from the healthy zone to the unhealthy zone.

Friend-o-cycle: The normal cycle in a friendship that brings the friendship back to the healthy zone after experiencing a Friendship Fire. The phases of the Friend-o-cycle are: Healthy Friendship – Fire – Confront the issue – Talk-it-Out – Forgive & Forget – Closer & Stronger – Healthy Friendship…

4 Friendship Facts: A set of four facts that help us have realistic expectations in our friendships so we understand what is normal.

  1. No friendship (relationship) is perfect.
  2. Every friendship is different.
  3. Trust & Respect are the two most important qualities of a friendship.
  4. Friendships change…and that’s okay.

Red Shirt Girl and Striped Shirt Boy: Two characters that remind us about the importance of body language.

Friendship Ninja: A Friendship Ninja is someone who surrounds themselves with friends in the healthy zone of the Friend-o-meter. A Friendship Ninja is kind and friendly to everyone. A Friendship Ninja understands the 4 Friendship Facts and puts out their Friendship Fires when they ignite. A Friendship Ninja stands up for themselves and their friends. A Friendship Ninja makes new friends and understands that friendships change…and that’s okay. Above all else, a Friendship Ninja is someone you want to be friends with because they’re true to who they are!


So, this activity is called ‘Boundary Building’ and you must be wondering what in the world that means?! Well, a boundary is kind of like a fence. Some boundaries are real objects like fences or walls and other boundaries are imaginary like an invisible force field that protects us. The one thing that all boundaries have in common is that they are designed specifically to keep the good stuff in and the bad stuff out. They are there to keep us safe!

We all need to have personal boundaries in our friendships and relationships to stay safe as well. Our personal boundaries allow us to let the good stuff in and keep the harmful stuff out. We have to make sure that our personal boundaries and force fields are strong in our friendships. If they aren’t strong, some of the not-so-good, hurtful things can break through our boundaries and harm us.

Some people naturally have strong boundaries and force fields to begin with, while some people have to work on building stronger boundaries every day to keep safe and well in their friendships. The stronger our boundaries and force fields are, the more resilient we become! This allows us to bounce back way quicker after Friendship Fires® and Mean-on-Purpose moments.

The good news is that keeping our boundaries and force fields strong gets a whole lot easier with practice! I’m curious to know, how strong is your force field or personal boundary?

Key Outcome

Your child will learn how to build healthy, safe relationships by strengthening their personal boundaries.


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