The Birthday Party Plan

Lesson Plan Glossary

Glossary of Terms

At URSTRONG, we believe it’s important to use kids’ language for kids’ problems. That’s why we have our very own, unique language of friendship. Here are some important terms that children, parents, and teachers learn in our program.

Friendship Fire®: Any situation between you and a friend that results in negative feelings.

Mean-on-Purpose: When someone is intentionally unkind to someone else.

Quick Comeback: A very short word or phrase that is used when someone is Mean-on-Purpose. Quick Comebacks are designed to let the other person know that you heard/saw what they did and you’re not okay with it.

Friend-o-meter: A visual tool that assesses the health of friendships, ranging from the healthy zone to the unhealthy zone.

Friend-o-cycle: The normal cycle in a friendship that brings the friendship back to the healthy zone after experiencing a Friendship Fire. The phases of the Friend-o-cycle are: Healthy Friendship – Fire – Confront the issue – Talk-it-Out – Forgive & Forget – Closer & Stronger – Healthy Friendship…

4 Friendship Facts: A set of four facts that help us have realistic expectations in our friendships so we understand what is normal.

  1. No friendship (relationship) is perfect.
  2. Every friendship is different.
  3. Trust & Respect are the two most important qualities of a friendship.
  4. Friendships change…and that’s okay.

Red Shirt Girl and Striped Shirt Boy: Two characters that remind us about the importance of body language.

Friendship Ninja: A Friendship Ninja is someone who surrounds themselves with friends in the healthy zone of the Friend-o-meter. A Friendship Ninja is kind and friendly to everyone. A Friendship Ninja understands the 4 Friendship Facts and puts out their Friendship Fires when they ignite. A Friendship Ninja stands up for themselves and their friends. A Friendship Ninja makes new friends and understands that friendships change…and that’s okay. Above all else, a Friendship Ninja is someone you want to be friends with because they’re true to who they are!

Bouncy castles are out and sleepovers are in! Birthday parties = cake, party hats, & hurt feelings. Help your students devise a plan.

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Birthday parties can be great fun, but they can also be the cause of many Friendship Fires®!

What do you do when it feels like everyone else has been invited to a birthday party except for you? What do you do when your parents tell you that you are only allowed to invite 3 friends to your party and you know all your other friends will be upset? What do you do when you find out that everyone else went to a sleepover on the weekend that you knew nothing about?

Having a plan for how to navigate birthday parties can really help to limit the dramaSo, letwork on creating a ‘Birthday Party Plan’ that is kind, fair and respectful to everybody!

Key Outcome

Your students will develop empathy for others, as well as the skills and ability to navigate tricky situations in friendships with self-awareness and kindness.


  • Pens and paper
  • Word processing technology – computer or ipad


  1. With your students, review Friendology 101 Session 7 – ‘Tricky Situations’ – particularly referring to the practice scenario: Birthday Party Blues.
  2. Ask your students, “Have you ever had your feelings hurt because of a birthday party?” Remind students that they can control their own actions and thoughts, but they cannot control other peoples’ actions and choices.
  3. Get your students to make a personal ‘Birthday Party Plan’ that outlines the choices that they are going to make when planning their own birthday party, to ensure that they are being kind and respectful towards others. Discuss some ideas with the class.
  4. Next, ask them to make a plan for what they will do if they find out they haven’t been invited to a birthday party. Help the students get comfortable with the idea that it’s impossible they will be invited to every single birthday party.
  5. Encourage students to make their plans creative, colorful and inviting, just like a Birthday Party Invitation! They can do them on paper or on the computer.
  6. Ask your students to share their ‘Birthday Party Plans’ with their classmates and with their parents and then put them up on display in your classroom.

Next Steps

Write birthday party Friendship Fire® scenarios on pieces of paper, roll the pieces of paper up and shove into deflated balloons. Instruct students to blow up and tie off a balloon. Play some music. When the music stops, select a student to pop their balloon and read out their scenario. Get them to role-play putting the Friendship Fire® out. Repeat until all the balloons are popped!