Language of Friendship Session 8: How to Calm the Butterflies

Video Glossary

Glossary of Terms

At URSTRONG, we believe it’s important to use kids’ language for kids’ problems. That’s why we have our very own, unique language of friendship. Here are some important terms that children, parents, and teachers learn in our program.

Friendship Fire®: Any situation between you and a friend that results in negative feelings.

Mean-on-Purpose: When someone is intentionally unkind to someone else.

Quick Comeback: A very short word or phrase that is used when someone is Mean-on-Purpose. Quick Comebacks are designed to let the other person know that you heard/saw what they did and you’re not okay with it.

Friend-o-meter: A visual tool that assesses the health of friendships, ranging from the healthy zone to the unhealthy zone.

Friend-o-cycle: The normal cycle in a friendship that brings the friendship back to the healthy zone after experiencing a Friendship Fire. The phases of the Friend-o-cycle are: Healthy Friendship – Fire – Confront the issue – Talk-it-Out – Forgive & Forget – Closer & Stronger – Healthy Friendship…

4 Friendship Facts: A set of four facts that help us have realistic expectations in our friendships so we understand what is normal.

  1. No friendship (relationship) is perfect.
  2. Every friendship is different.
  3. Trust & Respect are the two most important qualities of a friendship.
  4. Friendships change…and that’s okay.

Red Shirt Girl and Striped Shirt Boy: Two characters that remind us about the importance of body language.

Friendship Ninja: A Friendship Ninja is someone who surrounds themselves with friends in the healthy zone of the Friend-o-meter. A Friendship Ninja is kind and friendly to everyone. A Friendship Ninja understands the 4 Friendship Facts and puts out their Friendship Fires when they ignite. A Friendship Ninja stands up for themselves and their friends. A Friendship Ninja makes new friends and understands that friendships change…and that’s okay. Above all else, a Friendship Ninja is someone you want to be friends with because they’re true to who they are!


Do you ever get butterflies? You know that feeling in your tummy…when your nerves are getting the best of you? Some people call that ‘anxiety’, but you know what…we call those butterflies and we all experience them from time to time. It’s important to know that butterflies are a part of being human, which is such a bummer because they’re soooo uncomfortable. So, that’s why I’m going to teach you a few ways that you can tame those unruly critters so you can feel a little more in control of how you’re feeling.  And, since we’re all about friendship here at URSTRONG, it’s definitely easier to face our Friendship Fires when those butterflies have chilled out.

Grown-ups, it’s all about using kids’ language for kids’ problems so ditch the term ‘anxiety’ and let’s focus on butterflies. The good news is, there’s lots we can do to help that little person feel a bit more in control of this uncomfortable feeling. Let’s get started naming and taming them…here we go…

Your Friend,

A key philosophy embedded in our program is the importance of using kids’ language for kids’ problems. Rather than talking about words like “anxiety” or “stress”, we use the word “butterflies” – a friendlier term that kids can connect with. This session helps students take control of butterflies they feel inside so they feel more in control of their emotions.

Key Outcome

Your child will learn a few strategies to help calm their nerves & anxiety to feel more in control.

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