Language of Friendship Session 7: Dealing with an Unhealthy Relationship

Healthy Relationships

Video Glossary

Glossary of Terms

At URSTRONG, we believe it’s important to use kids’ language for kids’ problems. That’s why we have our very own, unique language of friendship. Here are some important terms that children, parents, and teachers learn in our program.

Friendship Fire®: Any situation between you and a friend that results in negative feelings.

Mean-on-Purpose: When someone is intentionally unkind to someone else.

Quick Comeback: A very short word or phrase that is used when someone is Mean-on-Purpose. Quick Comebacks are designed to let the other person know that you heard/saw what they did and you’re not okay with it.

Friend-o-meter: A visual tool that assesses the health of friendships, ranging from the healthy zone to the unhealthy zone.

Friend-o-cycle: The normal cycle in a friendship that brings the friendship back to the healthy zone after experiencing a Friendship Fire. The phases of the Friend-o-cycle are: Healthy Friendship – Fire – Confront the issue – Talk-it-Out – Forgive & Forget – Closer & Stronger – Healthy Friendship…

4 Friendship Facts: A set of four facts that help us have realistic expectations in our friendships so we understand what is normal.

No friendship (relationship) is perfect.
Every friendship is different.
Trust & Respect are the two most important qualities of a friendship.
Friendships change…and that’s okay.

Red Shirt Girl and Striped Shirt Boy: Two characters that remind us about the importance of body language.

Friendship Ninja: A Friendship Ninja is someone who surrounds themselves with friends in the healthy zone of the Friend-o-meter. A Friendship Ninja is kind and friendly to everyone. A Friendship Ninja understands the 4 Friendship Facts and puts out their Friendship Fires when they ignite. A Friendship Ninja stands up for themselves and their friends. A Friendship Ninja makes new friends and understands that friendships change…and that’s okay. Above all else, a Friendship Ninja is someone you want to be friends with because they’re true to who they are!

Objective

Alright, it’s happened. You’re stuck in an unhealthy friendship – one that feels bad, drags you down, and causes you wayyyy too much stress. It’s going to be okay and just know, you’re not alone. Almost all of us have at least one friendship that’s in the unhealthy zone of the Friend-o-meter.

But, it doesn’t have to be this way!

In this session, I’m going to teach you how to look at your friendship in a different way so that you can start to get it feeling good again. I’m going to help you try to move this friendship back to the healthy zone or, at the very least, help you FEEL like you’re more in control of this messy situation.

For the grown-up with you, I am sure you can relate to this situation and sometimes it’s so hard to know the right advice to give. It breaks our heart to see our children in these unhealthy situations…and, the struggle is real! As much as we wish we could prevent them from these experiences, I have to say, this is when they learn the most. As Dolly Parton said, “Storms make trees take deeper roots!” I’m so glad you’re there and are going to support them through and help them come out stronger.

Your Friend,
Dana

This session is focused on helping children take a strategic approach to an unhealthy friendship or relationship to ultimately get the friendship feeling healthy again. Practical strategies are applied to think about the friendship objectively, focusing on the positive qualities in the friendship.